In the sun I feel as one

5 things I loved about tonight

1. The collective “awwwwwwwww” from EVERYONE, including Snow White the waitress, when I told her I would be paying for his meal.
2. That awkward moment when the guy who you currently have a thing for has seen the last guy you had a thing for/now want to punch in the face before. No, seriously, it was mind-boggling him the entire night where he has seen him.
3. I now have a free private self-defense lesson in compensation for paying for his meal!
4. GNO WAS SO MUCH FUN. AND EXHAUSTING. IDK WHY I’M STILL UP TYPING THIS NOW INSTEAD OF WAITING TILL THE MORNING.
5. Some of the girls definitely had too much fun bahaha. ;)

5 things running through my mind right now

1. I hope I can hang out with you tomorrow.
2. I hope I can hang out with you every Friday night.
3. I hope I can ask you to formal.
4. I hope you can find time for training and hanging out with me.
5. I hope you’re not too good to be true…
6. Why am I attracted to unavailable men…?
7. #foreveralone
8. Why can’t I have this good thing in my life?
9. This is what I get for telling everyone about you and me.
10. I wish I could tell everyone that I’ve already talked to our whole story in one single swoop.
11. PLEASE.
12. PLEASE.
13. PLEASE.
14. LET ME.
15. LET ME.
16. LET ME.
17. LET ME GET WHAT I WANT.
18. THIS TIME.
19. Dammit.
20. This sucks.

5 things good about today

1. I can still smell whatever cologne you were wearing today.
2. Maybe it’s because you gave me two hugs before we left. :)
3. God, I could just listen to you talk all day. Intelligence has never turned me on so much.
4. I can’t stop smiling again. :))) Or rather, “daydreaming.”
5. Totally unrelated to the first four, but I also hung out with my good friend I’ve known for years that I haven’t seen in a long time! Can’t neglect that good thing either!!

5 things good about today

I’ve been meaning to change this to “things good about today” for a while, but I’ve forgotten. It comes from a quote a wise person said to me: “Try to find the good in each day,” and I’d rather have this be reflected onto that.

1. I had a really deep conversation with you today. I really hope I can hang out with you irl soon. You’re truly an interesting person.
2. I finally got a chance to work out today! Not only that, it was an intense one and an hour long!
3. I’ve also eaten healthy (except for my little treats at the end of the day) for the whole day, too!
4. I hung out with some good people.
5. I found a great online and iPhone flashcard app and I’ve entered a lot of them!
6. (A sixth one because I can.) I’ve also managed to have time to organize my room a bit.

Not a bad Monday, either. ;)

5 things I loved about yesterday

1. If people irl, especially my sisters lol, did not follow me on Tumblr, I’d tell you what this was. But for now, let’s just say it left me feeling extremely giddy. :))) And I’m sure y’all could figure it out, I’m not keeping it a secret, but I don’t want to announce it to everyone either.
2. OMG THAT BABY DOES THIS CUTE THING WITH HER CHEEKS THAT MAKES THEM ALL PUFFY AND CUTE AND OMG I WANT TO PINCH THEM FOREVER. <3<3<3
3. Although there wasn’t a chance for me to blow them apart, I finally got rid of those pictures.
4. “The only way to find out is if you kiss him.” But seriously, you always give the best advice.
5. I finally was able to have a good night’s rest! Hence why I did not post this yesterday like I was supposed to.

5 things I loved about today

1. Baby Chi Phis!
2. Theta bonding at Cane’s!
3. Finally mailing those late Christmas presents to my friends from San Antonio!
4. Working out and studying at the same time!
5. I met someone new at the Chi Phi bid day party tonight. :) Bahahahaha, who the fuck was the guy that I last liked again???

5 things I loved about yesterday

1. I deleted my personal Tumblr, hellokittydiary. After looking back at those good posts and deleting the bad ones before moving to my main Tumblr, all that was left were posts of pretty much a certain someone. And that definitely doesn’t make me happy anymore trololol. (And while I was deleting it, I found that this day a year ago was the day I first met my big. WOW, do times change.)
2. I had the phone conversation I needed from my high school physics teacher. Yeah, there was that whole thing that happened with us last semester, but that’s in the past now. So this does give hope that my big and I will be able to put this behind us too. Idk if it’s because these two events happened right after another, but I don’t want to see the day yet when my big and I can act like none of this bullshit ever happened. Anyways, I’ve told my big lots of things about my life and she’s said lots of helpful words back. However, my teacher is still the one person who I can bawl my eyes out to, have him listen to me instead of judge me, and give me the best words of advice. And that’s exactly what happened again. I don’t unhealthily think highly of him anymore, but I know my life would be more destructive without him. It also helps that he’s on my side of issue, too. >:)
3. I finally opened up to the girl I was always afraid of getting to know better only because I thought she felt the same way about me. How ironic that while I was more worried of how she was feeling, she was more worried about me! I have a good feeling we’re going to become better friends and sisters from different sororities. <3
4. I’m so glad I decided to spend my night with my active sorority sisters, lol. I went to FOCUS, Walmart to win a teddy bear on my first try at their claw machine (Seriously, I was so ecstatic about that! However, I was nervous because it got stuck on the claw and wouldn’t drop down for me to pick it up, but the entrance greeter saw my troubles and shook the machine enough so my prize did fall. =D ) and buy ingredients for cookie dough cupcakes, Dominos to pick up pizza only to see that my name was misspelled to “Jennika,” and one of my sisters’ apartment to make said cupcakes (the frosting didn’t really taste great, btw) and play Apples to Apples.
5. More than ever, I’m in control of my happiness. Sure, those people I’ve mentioned earlier, and everyone who has reached out to me so far, have helped me feel better, but I know my own happiness is only up to me. Not even my big sister. Not even some boy ass. If the only way I can be happy now is to have nothing to do with either of them, then I need to do that for my own health. I don’t deserve being sad anymore. :)))

5 things I loved about today

If y’all have just been paying attention to what I’ve been posting on FB, I’m not having a bad day. I promise.

1. That Kirby game was pretty funny lol!
2. The SOPA/PIPA blackout gave me an excuse to “censor” my free thinking. (Btw, if you wanted to know what I really said in my censored FB status earlier, it was, “[insert first and last name of a certain someone here] is an ass.”)
3. My meeting with my AES advisor only lasted for five minutes. He understood what I went through, knows I won’t have a problem this semester, and let me get on my way (after we talked about the confusion on my ethnicity :P ).
4. I had a refreshing phone conversation with my best friend. Watch out, [insert first and last name of a certain someone here].
5. I am amazed and blessed by the many people who care about me. Wow. <3

And btw, I have been doing my Project 366. I just haven’t really had time to upload my pics. :P

And I’m probably going to be too busy to do any more Tumblr challenges. Sorry!

5 things I will miss about San Antonio

1. Authentic Mexican food. What that city lacks in Asian food, they make up for with Mexican. I cannot tell you a single restaurant near me that serves that good quality of food besides Taco Cabana, and if this even counts, Taco Bell. *barf*
2. The Spurs. Especially when they play against the Maver-dicks.
3. Texas Hill Country. Technically, it’s an hour west of the city, but it’s a lot closer to San Antonio than it is from Dallas! I wanna go shooting again. I do wanna own a gun someday. A Hello Kitty rifle.
4. Freddy’s being no more than five minutes away from my house. Eating veggie burgers and custard on a regular basis, mmmmm.
5. “You two are the only reasons why I go back to San Antonio.” More like a best friend and a second family now. I know they’d all be so much happier if they moved to Dallas. I miss them so much already. </3

5 things I won’t miss about San Antonio

1. Driving so much/rarely anyone picking me up. Out of the many times I’ve gone out over the winter break, only three times did someone offer to drive me around, and one of them didn’t even count because he was a friend from college! I know I go to college, not only that, a heavily commuter college, where more people own cars, or at least have their licenses. And yes, several of my friends in San Antonio don’t know how to drive, so that’s understandable. And yes, I did visit my high school a lot and one, I didn’t think my physics teacher would want to pick me up/drop me off and two, I didn’t want to wake up at 6:30 in the morning to do that (actually, I did get to ride in his hot red convertible again, so that was one of the other times someone did offer to drive). However, did common courtesy not travel with me from Dallas? Even when I knew I was tired of being the chauffeur, I still asked if they’d like to be picked up along with the option of having them pick me up instead. It also sucked because my car was in the shop for a week.
2. Friends not being as eager to hang out with me. I love y’all, that’s obviously why I wanted to hang out with you so much. But you’ve got to be just as willing to hang out with me too! Otherwise, I’m going to start to “forget” to schedule time for you like what you do to me too, and I’m not a very forgetful person. The person I hung out the most with this break was my high school physics teacher. Even for me, that’s pretty fucking sad (although, I had the best times I’ve had yet in life because of him including playing with a baby and going shooting with real bullets for the first time).
3. Lack of good Asian restaurants. Finally, we discovered a boba drink place that I don’t have to drive 30 minutes to get to. It still wasn’t great quality though. But that was just Thai food. What about Indian, Vietnamese, Chinese? And no, those Chinese buffets, although worth the price, are only just decent.
4. My parents needing to know where I’m at all times. By the time I’m at my parents’ house for the night is usually around the time I go out to a party at college.
5. Awkward high school reunions. Wondering, “Should I go up and say hi?” is just too much anxiety to place on a potential conversation with someone you’re never going to talk to again unless you haphazardly bump into him/her again.